Things that are funny to me but may not be to you

So on the news feed I get on my phone... there was a story last week about a kid who was decapitated by a ride at Six Flags

no, thats not the funny part.

So aparently, the kid climbed over the fence of the Batman ride...got too close, and the ride took off his head... It's tragic, yes

But the funny part? The story said "Teenager decapitated by ride... autopsies still being done"

What else do you need to know?

Cause of death...he has no head!

Next thing... let me disclaimer this one by saying that I take AMBER Alerts very seriously and find no humor in the actual abduction or situation

But there is one funny thing
This morning, dad and I were on our way to work and saw a sign for a child abduction

the car? an '84 red PORCHE

not very inconspicuous if you ask me.

Even better was on the way home there was another alert...

The car? A purple and gold RV!

Seriously? What happened to unmarked vans?


I think that's all I had to say

oh yeah, and... 33 days!

Not My Friend

So I was listening to my jazz selection on my ipod at work today and this song came on and I absolutely love it... it's a good emo jazz song...if those even exist... anyway... do you ever have those songs that just perfectly describe how you're feeling at the moment?


this is it. It's called "Not My Friend" by Norah Jones


"Not My Friend"
Help me breathe,
Help me believe,
You seem really glad that I am sad.

You are not my friend,
I cannot pretend that you are.
You made it sting,
Your voice is ringing,
Just like the boys who laughed at me in school.

You are not my friend,I
cannot pretend anymore.

You found a place,
No one should ever go.
I'll be ok,'
cause when I back away
I'm gonna keep the handle of your gun in sight.

"The Office"

No, not the show.



My office...well, not MY office... Technically the office belongs to the Baldwin Park Industrial Center....But you get the picture.



In case I haven't told any of you... I work for my dad now. At a comapny called California Lighting Sales. They're a lighting brokerage. They...(or shall I say "we") are kind of the middle man between the people who manufacture lighting fixtures...and conractors.



Anyway, I work back in the accounting office..I do data entry, cover phones, file, tap dance, whatever they need done... sans the tap dance



Not terribly exciting... but it's a great job and I make pretty good money. And I work full time! YAY! Nepotism at its finest.



The office environment is a funny culture. In alot of ways, this office reminds me of the show. Complete with nutty employees... (present company excluded)



The same people take the same lunch everyday...they all have specific turns at the microwave...they all sit at the same place at the same table and watch the same soap opera everday. They even eat the same thing everyday. It's even the same basic conversation. It's amazing!



One of these days, I want to go sit in someone else's seat just to see what would happen. I'd probably be banned from the lunch room for all eternity. haha.

It's like clock work, though...its amazing

my boss asked me "do you know how to put things in numerical order?"

My response in my head "you mean can i count?"
My actual response:" Sure do!"

My Boss "Do you know how to alphabetize things?"
Response in my head:" do i know my ABC's? YEAH! Wanna sing along with me?I know my alphabet in 2 different languages, thankyouverymuch!"
Actual Response:" Yes m'am"

I think that's all I had to say about the office environment :)for now, at least...

OOH! I get a swipey badge to get in the gates and in the office...i have my own desk/cubicle a computer, even my own extension! YES! I AM important

The office building even has a gym...I plan to start working out on my lunch break...awesome!!

catharsis

Catharsis

Not her
Not good enough
Not tall enough
Not athletic enough
Not pretty enough
Not thin enough
Not worth my pain

Too much pain
Too many sacrifices
Too much fighting
Too hurtful
Too much sleep lost over you
Too many tears
Too hard

No love
No respect
No time for apologies
No more taking up space in my head
No more crying myself to sleep
No more wasted time

So what
So hard
So wrong
So broken
So hurtful
So... done

Just wow

There's so much to talk about


But somehow, I can't find words


I'm so completely done... I'm SO ready to go into AIM now.


Onward and Upward!

one more thing

So when the kids get in trouble, they have to fill out these forms called "stinky fish". Yvonne got in trouble and had to fill one out.

I made a STINKY FISH! choice. My Stinky fish behavior was...
"Ryan made me laugh and he got me in trouble"

Next time I "CHOOSE MY ATTITUDE" I plan to...
"Ryan not to make me laugh anymore"

.....way to pass the buck... you'd make a great politician..


Can we say SPOILED?!

Ohh Children

How I love them! My mom is a teacher and she currently has a long-term sub job for a second grade class at the elementary school I attended. A couple weeks ago, they went on a field trip to the Tide Pools. When they came back, mom had them write a 7 sentence paragraph about their trip. Clearly, that's the worst punishment ever! 7 whole sentences! BAD MRS. HALL! Lol. Anyway, She put them in a book for the parents to look at tonight at open house. Here are some of the top contenders for most hilarious.

When Mrs. Hall says 7 sentences...they'll write them... even if they don't make sense! I'm copying them exactly as they read.... full of punctuation errors and such... for effect. Second graders are the BUSINESS!

My comments will be in italics.

This is by Anna Z.
Today I would like to tell you about tidepools.
First, we saw lots of mussles.
We saw lots of mussels because the didn't want to be in the water.
Second, we had lots of fun.
We had lots of fun becasued we got to find sea animals.
Third, we found a starfish.
We saw a starfish because Mrs. Kim told us.
Fourth, we saw a crab.
We found the crab by see him walking (whiskey tango foxtrot?!)
Last, I hope you enjoy learning about tidepools.

Anna's was written more like an epic poem (please see The Odyssey)


This is Brayden's
Today I am going to tell you about the tidepools. First, there are sea anemones. Second, they look like donuts. Third, we made a list of the things we saw (including this list, Brayden?) Fourth, I enjoyed the tidepools and I hope you did, too!


By: Devon
One day at the tide pools we had a field trip. (hmm, Devon...is your sentence a little backwards?)
George and I saw a starfish, hermit crab, regular crab, sand crab, and a lot of birds. We had a lot of fun. Then we ate lunch.

Devon, you are a thrilling author....The pinnacle of the story was eating lunch.. yet it was at the end of the paragraph... I...am impressed!

Jeremy took the "compare and contrast" approach in this one
Today I would like to tell you about tidepools. First, I went on the bus. It was a long ride.
Second, we had to go down the stairs. IT took forever. Third, we finaly got down the stairs. It was fun to play in the tide pool.
Fourth we had lunch. It was delicious!
Fith, we went up the stairs. It took longer (did the stairs magically grow?!) Last, we went home. It took shorter. (shorter what?)


Ok...now... the one that made me laugh the hardest!
This is Krystal N.'s
On Tuesday I went to the beach. I saw a seagull, starfish, a dead fish and an octopus! Some people saw a jelly fish. But I didn't. (lol @ fragmented sentences) Soon we ate lunch. After lunch I went back to the rocks and found some more stuff (like ambiguity?) MY favorite one was the star fish (favorite one what? favorite ambiguous object?) It was big and orange. I had a fun. (a fun what?! Ohhh Krystal..please don't leave me in suspense any longer!!!) Then it was time to go. I took the sand out of my shoes (good to know...sandy shoes are no fun) We only have five more minutes (until what?! this kid is a regular Agatha Christie) I just looked at the others. Then it was time to go. (hahahahahahahahhaa!!! I just looked at the others? That's AMAZING!!)
The End

Oh wow... I love children!