I teach preschool...at church. I have for a while now, and I love it. Mind you, they still drive me crazy from time to time, but for the most part, it's a joy. To watch a child's faith form, is an incredible thing. That wide-eyed innocence is amazing. I co-teach with my mom. And we do VBS (vacation Bible school) all year round now.
Usually, we spend two weeks on one lesson. So last week's and yesterday's lesson was about Jesus walking on the water.
Just a quick re-cap. The apostles were in the boat, and Jesus went up a mountain to pray. There was a storm, and the boat was being tossed around. So, Jesus, being the Savior that he is, started walking on the water towards the boat.
Let me just pause for a second and say... WOW... I think, because I was raised in a Christian household, and I've heard it all my life, that I take that kind of stuff for granted.
WHO ELSE could walk on water but my Jesus?... no one...that's who.
Ok..back to the story... So the apostles (being the silly humans they were) got freaked out because people really can't walk on water...And Jesus told them "Don't be afraid...It is I"... So Peter (who proves time and time again to be lacking some common sense) says "Alright, if you're really Jesus, then let me walk out to you"... So Jesus says "ok...come on"Peter starts walking on water towards Jesus....and instead of fixing his eyes on Jesus, he looked down at the waves and the wind, and got scared! Then he started to sink (serves him right!)
And of course Peter yells "Jesus! Save me!"And Jesus extended his arm and pulled Peter up...then says "Why didn't you trust me?"
Why didn't Peter trust Jesus?...
And then it hit me... I'm Peter... I've been trying to raise support for AIM and I've completely left God out of it. Why haven't I trusted Jesus?
I've sent support letters, I've made calls, I done presentations...but what haven't I done?
PRAYED!
I'm Peter... I'm sinking and I'm yelling for Jesus to pull me up out of this water I'm in. I'm splashing around making a big scene...but all I have to do is have faith.
I'm tired of being Peter. I'm trusting Jesus. He knows what He's doing. God has called me to missions... and He's trying to teach me something. But I won't shut up long enough to hear Him. I'm sorry, Jesus for hurting you and losing faith.
So from you, my faithful readers, I bequeath prayers. Pray for me to maintain faith and walk out on this water and NOT LOOK DOWN even when the waves are above my head.
As you well know...music is such a huge part of my life and while I wrote this blog, I was reminded of the Casting Crowns song "Voice of Truth"
Oh what I would do to have
The kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is
And He's holding out His hand
But the waves are calling out my name And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
Time and time again.
"Boy, you'll never win!""You'll never win!"
Chorus: But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, "Do not be afraid!"
The voice of truth says, "This is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
60 views
That's really sad! I've had my blog for 5 months and it's only been viewed 60 times
Seriously? That's 12 times a month....That's 3 times a week. That's not even once a day!
Ladies and gentlemen...She did math without her fingers! WOOO!!!
Now that I've been updating more, I expected people to read it more...aparently not.
Sadtimes, guys...sadtimes. Lol. I'm going to put a poll up or maybe a Pole? Lol ohhh puns...
anyway...I'll create a poll and see if people would read my blog more if I updated more often.
But if no one reads it... no one will vote; ergo, defeating the purpose of the poll.... but I'll give it the 'ol College try!
Seriously? That's 12 times a month....That's 3 times a week. That's not even once a day!
Ladies and gentlemen...She did math without her fingers! WOOO!!!
Now that I've been updating more, I expected people to read it more...aparently not.
Sadtimes, guys...sadtimes. Lol. I'm going to put a poll up or maybe a Pole? Lol ohhh puns...
anyway...I'll create a poll and see if people would read my blog more if I updated more often.
But if no one reads it... no one will vote; ergo, defeating the purpose of the poll.... but I'll give it the 'ol College try!
Monday, July 14, 2008
more poetry
This one's a bit more personal... but no one really reads my blog anyway lol...it's about my sister!
no she's not dead... she just moved to the other side of the world!
When someone asks me if I miss you
I dont know what to say
When someone asks me if I miss you
I tell them "every single day"
When someone asks me if I miss you
the answer should be clear
When someone asks me if I miss you
i say "Whenever she's not here"
When someone asks me if I miss you
I don't know where to start
when someone asks me if I miss you
I say "I'm missing half my heart"
When someone asks me if I miss you
Because they know you chose to leave
So now when someone asks me if I miss you
I'll answer "Only when I breathe"
no she's not dead... she just moved to the other side of the world!
When someone asks me if I miss you
I dont know what to say
When someone asks me if I miss you
I tell them "every single day"
When someone asks me if I miss you
the answer should be clear
When someone asks me if I miss you
i say "Whenever she's not here"
When someone asks me if I miss you
I don't know where to start
when someone asks me if I miss you
I say "I'm missing half my heart"
When someone asks me if I miss you
Because they know you chose to leave
So now when someone asks me if I miss you
I'll answer "Only when I breathe"
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Things that are funny to me but may not be to you
So on the news feed I get on my phone... there was a story last week about a kid who was decapitated by a ride at Six Flags
no, thats not the funny part.
So aparently, the kid climbed over the fence of the Batman ride...got too close, and the ride took off his head... It's tragic, yes
But the funny part? The story said "Teenager decapitated by ride... autopsies still being done"
What else do you need to know?
Cause of death...he has no head!
Next thing... let me disclaimer this one by saying that I take AMBER Alerts very seriously and find no humor in the actual abduction or situation
But there is one funny thing
This morning, dad and I were on our way to work and saw a sign for a child abduction
the car? an '84 red PORCHE
not very inconspicuous if you ask me.
Even better was on the way home there was another alert...
The car? A purple and gold RV!
Seriously? What happened to unmarked vans?
I think that's all I had to say
oh yeah, and... 33 days!
no, thats not the funny part.
So aparently, the kid climbed over the fence of the Batman ride...got too close, and the ride took off his head... It's tragic, yes
But the funny part? The story said "Teenager decapitated by ride... autopsies still being done"
What else do you need to know?
Cause of death...he has no head!
Next thing... let me disclaimer this one by saying that I take AMBER Alerts very seriously and find no humor in the actual abduction or situation
But there is one funny thing
This morning, dad and I were on our way to work and saw a sign for a child abduction
the car? an '84 red PORCHE
not very inconspicuous if you ask me.
Even better was on the way home there was another alert...
The car? A purple and gold RV!
Seriously? What happened to unmarked vans?
I think that's all I had to say
oh yeah, and... 33 days!
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Not My Friend
So I was listening to my jazz selection on my ipod at work today and this song came on and I absolutely love it... it's a good emo jazz song...if those even exist... anyway... do you ever have those songs that just perfectly describe how you're feeling at the moment?
this is it. It's called "Not My Friend" by Norah Jones
"Not My Friend"
Help me breathe,
Help me believe,
You seem really glad that I am sad.
You are not my friend,
I cannot pretend that you are.
You made it sting,
Your voice is ringing,
Just like the boys who laughed at me in school.
You are not my friend,I
cannot pretend anymore.
You found a place,
No one should ever go.
I'll be ok,'
cause when I back away
I'm gonna keep the handle of your gun in sight.
this is it. It's called "Not My Friend" by Norah Jones
"Not My Friend"
Help me breathe,
Help me believe,
You seem really glad that I am sad.
You are not my friend,
I cannot pretend that you are.
You made it sting,
Your voice is ringing,
Just like the boys who laughed at me in school.
You are not my friend,I
cannot pretend anymore.
You found a place,
No one should ever go.
I'll be ok,'
cause when I back away
I'm gonna keep the handle of your gun in sight.
Monday, June 9, 2008
"The Office"
No, not the show.
My office...well, not MY office... Technically the office belongs to the Baldwin Park Industrial Center....But you get the picture.
In case I haven't told any of you... I work for my dad now. At a comapny called California Lighting Sales. They're a lighting brokerage. They...(or shall I say "we") are kind of the middle man between the people who manufacture lighting fixtures...and conractors.
Anyway, I work back in the accounting office..I do data entry, cover phones, file, tap dance, whatever they need done... sans the tap dance
Not terribly exciting... but it's a great job and I make pretty good money. And I work full time! YAY! Nepotism at its finest.
The office environment is a funny culture. In alot of ways, this office reminds me of the show. Complete with nutty employees... (present company excluded)
The same people take the same lunch everyday...they all have specific turns at the microwave...they all sit at the same place at the same table and watch the same soap opera everday. They even eat the same thing everyday. It's even the same basic conversation. It's amazing!
One of these days, I want to go sit in someone else's seat just to see what would happen. I'd probably be banned from the lunch room for all eternity. haha.
It's like clock work, though...its amazing
my boss asked me "do you know how to put things in numerical order?"
My response in my head "you mean can i count?"
My actual response:" Sure do!"
My Boss "Do you know how to alphabetize things?"
Response in my head:" do i know my ABC's? YEAH! Wanna sing along with me?I know my alphabet in 2 different languages, thankyouverymuch!"
Actual Response:" Yes m'am"
I think that's all I had to say about the office environment :)for now, at least...
OOH! I get a swipey badge to get in the gates and in the office...i have my own desk/cubicle a computer, even my own extension! YES! I AM important
The office building even has a gym...I plan to start working out on my lunch break...awesome!!
My office...well, not MY office... Technically the office belongs to the Baldwin Park Industrial Center....But you get the picture.
In case I haven't told any of you... I work for my dad now. At a comapny called California Lighting Sales. They're a lighting brokerage. They...(or shall I say "we") are kind of the middle man between the people who manufacture lighting fixtures...and conractors.
Anyway, I work back in the accounting office..I do data entry, cover phones, file, tap dance, whatever they need done... sans the tap dance
Not terribly exciting... but it's a great job and I make pretty good money. And I work full time! YAY! Nepotism at its finest.
The office environment is a funny culture. In alot of ways, this office reminds me of the show. Complete with nutty employees... (present company excluded)
The same people take the same lunch everyday...they all have specific turns at the microwave...they all sit at the same place at the same table and watch the same soap opera everday. They even eat the same thing everyday. It's even the same basic conversation. It's amazing!
One of these days, I want to go sit in someone else's seat just to see what would happen. I'd probably be banned from the lunch room for all eternity. haha.
It's like clock work, though...its amazing
my boss asked me "do you know how to put things in numerical order?"
My response in my head "you mean can i count?"
My actual response:" Sure do!"
My Boss "Do you know how to alphabetize things?"
Response in my head:" do i know my ABC's? YEAH! Wanna sing along with me?I know my alphabet in 2 different languages, thankyouverymuch!"
Actual Response:" Yes m'am"
I think that's all I had to say about the office environment :)for now, at least...
OOH! I get a swipey badge to get in the gates and in the office...i have my own desk/cubicle a computer, even my own extension! YES! I AM important
The office building even has a gym...I plan to start working out on my lunch break...awesome!!
Saturday, June 7, 2008
catharsis
Catharsis
Not her
Not good enough
Not tall enough
Not athletic enough
Not pretty enough
Not thin enough
Not worth my pain
Too much pain
Too many sacrifices
Too much fighting
Too hurtful
Too much sleep lost over you
Too many tears
Too hard
No love
No respect
No time for apologies
No more taking up space in my head
No more crying myself to sleep
No more wasted time
So what
So hard
So wrong
So broken
So hurtful
So... done
Not her
Not good enough
Not tall enough
Not athletic enough
Not pretty enough
Not thin enough
Not worth my pain
Too much pain
Too many sacrifices
Too much fighting
Too hurtful
Too much sleep lost over you
Too many tears
Too hard
No love
No respect
No time for apologies
No more taking up space in my head
No more crying myself to sleep
No more wasted time
So what
So hard
So wrong
So broken
So hurtful
So... done
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
